A new report, however, shows that such a separation usually means the end a marriage. Nearly 90 percent of married couples who live apart for a time wind up divorcing, according to a report presented by researchers at a major university.
]]> The researchers based their conclusions on data taken from more than 7,200 people who were 22 or younger in 1979 and married. Of that sample group, 51 percent remained married. Among the others, 60 percent of those said they had separated, with 79 percent of them getting divorced.Many separations begin because couples have a hard time relinquishing their hold on the past and recognizing their marriages are over. In other cases, many women choose a separation initially because they have small children, the researchers said. In fact, when couples have children younger than 5 years old, they are much more likely to seek a separation before divorcing.
The researcher said choosing to separate is more common than deciding to go straight to a divorce. In most cases, separations last a year or less, but some go on as long as a decade. Still, in few cases, the couple sometimes never divorces, with 7 percent of separations lasting for 10 years or more.
Based on the research, the first separation lasts about four years. For people who divorce after separating, they stay separated for three years. And for those who ultimately beat the odds and get back together, the average time of a separation is two years.
Source: USA Today, "Splitting? 79% of marital separations end in divorce," Sharon Jayson, May 6, 2012
]]>Officials have charged the estranged husband of a missing mother of triplets with first-degree murder. The man is now in jail in Louisiana, serving a five-year term after pleading guilty last fall to threatening to kill his sister-in-law via online postings.
]]> On June 1, 2011, witnesses reported seeing the woman leave her husband's home, but she never arrived home.The man and his wife were parents to 5-year-old triplets and had been married 17 years at the time of her disappearance. The day she vanished, they had attended a meeting at an attorney's office to discuss terms of the divorce. Discussions about topics such as child custody, tax deductions and a retirement accounts angered the man, investigators said.
The woman had primary custody of the children, with the father holding visitation rights. On the day of the meeting, she told her sister she was heading to her husband's house to pick up their son. When she did not return, her family contacted authorities because the woman told her in the past he would kill her and the children if they ever split up.
Since the woman's disappearance, police interviewed several witnesses who helped them to build a circumstantial case against the man. The owner of the home the man rented said the home had traces of what appeared to be blood in the bathroom. A police lab test showed the blood contained DNA that was likely to have come from the man's wife.
Additionally, police located the woman's computer, which they said contained a diary spelling out the man's threats.
This is an extreme case, but no spouse should tolerate threats from the other spouse. A husband or wife with reason to believe a spouse might cause harm should contact a family law attorney and the police. A restraining order can be part of divorce proceedings.
Source: 9News, "Husband charged in missing mom's murder," Kevin Held, April 24, 2012
]]>Experts said that during the divorce process, or as soon as possible after, is the right time to draft a plan and agree on how to approach the college years. Waiting until the child is ready to go to college is too late. Many of these decisions could be part of a prenuptial agreement.
]]> Some recommendations experts have regarding this are:· Add to the divorce decree that both parents will cooperate in completing financial aid forms.
· Identify in divorce papers which parent will pay which expenses. Expenses include more than just books, tuition and room and board. Consider who will pay for things such as college application fees, the cost of standardized tests and transportation to college visits.
· The parent who makes the least money should have custody, and the tax deduction that comes with it, the year before the child applies to college. That arrangement makes students eligible to seek additional financial aid.
· Place a cap on all of the expenses and limit what each will pay. Assign a dollar amount if that is possible to do. While it might be difficult to judge what a college education will cost in the future, the parents could agree to each pay half of all fees, tuition and housing expenses. Parents also can specify how long they will pay the expenses, such as four years only, or that they will only pay for an undergraduate degree.
· Include the requirement that each parent has life and disability insurance to cover expenses relating to college, should one die or become disabled.
Source: Huffington Post, "Divorce Questions: How Is College Tuition Divided Among Exes?" Honoree Corder and Beth Walker, April 17, 2012
]]>A Louisiana man filed for divorce from his wife in 2006. The couple signed an agreement regarding temporary custody of their daughter, and spousal support to the wife was established. The wife filed paperwork seeking joint custody of their daughter, child support, spousal support and use of their home.
]]> Less than three months later, the wife filed an additional motion, charging her husband with violating custody and support orders.After years of back-and-forth filings, a judge did not finalize a settlement until April 2011. The husband appealed the decisions to award his ex-wife legal fees of about $5,600, to require him to pay nearly $30,000 in back child support, and to give his ex-wife $200 per month in spousal support and nearly $700 in child support.
For the appellate court to overturn any of those findings, the judges would have had to find a judicial error or that the facts in the case were not correct.
In the issue of the back child support, the man had claimed the judge had a bias against him or committed judicial misconduct. The appellate court found no evidence of that and upheld the decision.
The man argued he should not need to pay spousal support because his wife caused the end of their marriage through an extramarital affair. The woman said their marriage ended because of her husband's threats to harm her. The appellate court said the man would need proof of the affair, and that he did not prove his allegation.
The judges also disagreed that he shouldn't pay that much child support, stating that since their divorce the mother had earned more than ever and still needed his assistance. In a case such as this, the man will have to prove that the amount of child support he owes is too much for him to afford.
Source: Leagle, "Barlow v. Barlow," April 11, 2012
]]>The couple moved to a nearby state with their four daughters and bought a house, living there until Hurricane Katrina damaged the home in 2005. The man stayed in their hometown while the wife and their children moved out. The plan was for the family to reunite after the completion of home repairs.
]]> According to court records, the man had an affair, and in 2007 he filed for divorce after 15 years of marriage. The couple's divorce battle lasted a year and was settled after a two-day trial.In 2010, the man appealed the ruling, asking for a modification to the division of the equity in their home, the alimony and a tax issue. For any change to occur, the man would have to prove that the trial judge erred in his ruling.
In the divorce ruling, the judge studied the value and the repairs remaining to be completed with Hurricane Katrina grant funds. After the analysis, he valued the equity in the home at nearly $52,000. He awarded the home to the mother until the children reached adulthood, at which time they would sell the home and share the proceeds. The judge ordered them to share all costs pertaining to the home, including the mortgage, insurance and upkeep. Upon review, the appellate panel found all matters of state law had been correctly applied.
The judges also refused to modify the alimony. The man was ordered to pay for COBRA health insurance until those benefits expired, then to give her $250 per month. He said that his monthly shortfall -- nearly $1,100 per month -- did not allow him to pay that amount and that an error had been made.
The appellate judges, however, did not find fault in the initial ruling that said the man's earning potential was higher than his ex-wife's and that his misconduct had caused the dissolution of their marriage. If the man can continue to prove a financial hardship, he may be able to get a modification of alimony in the future. The couple could have also avoided the court fight by negotiating a prenuptial agreement.
Source: Leagle, "Picard v. Picard," April 3, 2012
]]>Today, more than 25 percent of divorces involved older Americans, as opposed to fewer than 10 percent in 1990. In 2009, Americans between 50 and 64 divorced at a rate of 12.6 for every 1,000 married people.
]]> Researchers have not figured out why this is happening. Perhaps, they said, it is because more women are working than in the past, and they can support themselves. Experts also speculate that since Americans now live longer, people might want to enjoy the second half of life as an unmarried individual.Sociologists admit that to this point, their research has focused on younger Americans. People aged 50 and older didn't typically divorce, but instead spent their years alone when a partner died. Now, sociologists said they should study the effects of divorce after 50.
One woman, who leads groups for singles, said that she has started to see divorces that come after 30 or more years of marriage. She said the effects often prove devastating, especially when combined with other changes that come with age, such as the loss of a parent. And two-thirds of these older divorces are being filed by the wives.
Divorce among older people also brings complications that don't arise for divorcees in their 20s, for example. Since the net worth of a couple in their 50s or beyond usually exceeds that of younger divorced couples, they also must reach agreements on dividing assets like mutual funds, children's college costs and health insurance.
Source: The Kansas City Star, "Generation Ex: Boomer couples are divorcing at a record rate," Rick Montgomery, April 1, 2012
]]>In some instances, including a recent U.S. Supreme Court case, a child's parents forbid grandparents to have any visitation rights whatsoever. This situation can leave the grandparents in a very difficult and painful situation. Sometimes, grandparents may feel so compelled to spend time with the grandchildren that they file a legal claim with the hope that they will gain court-ordered visitation time.
]]> Involving a family law court in a grandparents' rights dispute can create a lot of bitterness and pain between all of those involved. Thankfully, there are some ways to help grandparents and parents minimize the stress and tension that can arise during a visitation conflict:When respectful negotiations between parents and grandparents fall apart, grandparents may have some legal options. However, in general, legal rights for grandparents are limited, especially if the children's parents are deemed to be capable to provide for their child's needs. In any case, everyone involved in a grandparents' visitation dispute should always make the children their chief concern. This way, it may be easier for families to work through their issues and create a mutually-beneficial arrangement.
Source: AARP, "7 Ways to Avoid Conflict Over Grandparent Visitation," Amy Goyer, March 23, 2012
]]>In the original custody order, set in late 2008, when the child's mother was incarcerated in another southeastern state, the father filed a motion requesting custody of the child. A family court ordered joint custody and a 50-50 share of the child once the mother got out of prison.
]]> Nearly three years later, in August 2011, the father returned to court, asking to move with the child to Louisiana. After hearing testimony from both parents about their jobs and residency, the court named the father the primary residential parent, deciding he and the child could move to Louisiana.The child's mother, however, appealed the ruling, saying that relocating did not serve her child's best interests, and that the decision contradicted the original custody order. She argued the child was better off staying where she lived.
In the appellate court, the man showed evidence of his stable job in Louisiana, adding that the child had lived with him there during some of the mother's time in prison. The mother said she had not held a job since her release two months earlier. Still, the mother contended that by allowing the child to leave the state, the court had failed to adhere to law and previous judicial orders in the case.
In the end, the appellate court ruled that the family court did not change the joint custody ruling by giving the father primary physical custody. Changing the time spent with each parent did not modify the custody orders, the appellate court said, adding it could not have declared the relocation approval in error unless the family court applied incorrect law.
Source: Leagle, "Hayes v. Hayes," Court of Appeals of Kentucky, March 16, 2012
]]>The child, now almost 5 years old, resided with her mother and grandmother in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, until she was 10 months old. Her father visited frequently from his home in Hammond, about 50 miles away. When the girl's grandmother moved to Texas, the girl and her mother moved in with the father.
]]> When the couple's relationship broke up, they lived apart and shared custody of the girl for about a year. But in February 2010, the mother and daughter moved out of state to reestablish residency with the grandmother.The father filed papers opposing his ex-girlfriend's move with his daughter and sought a custody decision. After more than a year, the judge gave the mother physical custody and allowed her to move out of state. The judge also ordered monthly support from the father totaling $1,144.
The father, however, appealed the case, contending the trial judge made several errors.
The mother argues that she moved because her daughter would have better housing, schools and job opportunities. The appellate judges ultimately decided that the woman's move could provide a stable life for her daughter, despite the father's objection that he could not spend as much time with her.
The appellate judges, however, recalculated the father's child support at $1,038.24 per month. While it may not seem like much savings, sometimes noncustodial parents without a stable source of income may not be able to meet their obligations. This is why modifications are sometimes allowed.
Source: Leagle, "Dours v. O'Neill," Court of Appeals of Louisiana, First Circuit, March 9, 2012
]]>Now, the woman must give $756 a month to her ex-husband, the amount an earlier judge had calculated was her share. The Louisiana Department of Social Services had brought suit against her when she didn't pay the court-ordered support.
]]> The couple's three daughters, an 11 year old and 8-year-old twins, live with their father in Louisiana. After their divorce, the mother moved out of state. Since her move, she has held jobs working as a photographer on commission, in a retail shipping center and as a ski instructor.The woman holds a degree in elementary education and worked as a school teacher in Louisiana until her marriage in 1997. After that, she said she worked in her husband's law office or in one of the liquor stores they owned. The woman said she got her teaching certificate in Colorado in September 2010 but has not found a job.
The state Department of Social Services contended that given her degree and background she had a higher earning potential and could find employment in her field. State officials said that if she were a teacher in Louisiana, she would earn $3,425 each month. Her ex-husband's gross monthly income is more than $15,000. But applying state formulas that take each income into account, the woman's support payment should be $756 each month, according to the department.
While this sounds like a difficult situation because the father makes so much more, raising children is expensive. If the court ordered her to pay the child support, she needs to comply.
Source: Court of Appeals of Louisiana, Third Circuit, "State Department of Children and Family Services Child Support Enforcement v. Seaman," March 7, 2012
]]>The federal government said it plans to start paying Social Security, disability and veterans' benefits electronically in March 2013. This could be unwelcome news for parents in Louisiana and across the country who have child-support debts.
The Treasury Department says it will save money when it stops writing benefit checks and instead transfers funds electronically. However, it will also allow state agencies to take funds from bank accounts of people who owe back child support. Sometimes the owed money has lingered for decades, because noncustodial parents could not afford to make the payments.
Advocates for the poor and disabled recipients of federal benefits say that in some instances, the old child-support debts have lingered for decades. The children are now adults who in some cases support their parents. A bulk of the funds still outstanding that states will seek to collect will be interest and fees that accumulated when the parents could not afford pay.
Most of the money collected will not go to the children, but rather to states. States are allowed to seek reimbursement of any costs associated to welfare the states provided for children.
This change does not necessarily sit well with officials of the federal Department of Health and Human Services, which oversees collection of child support. A spokesman said the agency does not want needy people to be denied their only source of income.
Source: Associated Press, "Avoiding child support debt to get tougher," Daniel Wagner, Feb. 28, 2012
]]>The custody dispute started in November 2011, when the boy was taken by his mother, singer Mindy McCready, from her mother's house without permission during a supervised visit. The grandmother and her husband have had legal custody of the child since 2007.
]]> A judge in Florida, where the grandparents and the child lived, has ruled that his state holds jurisdiction in the matter, even though the boy is living in a foster home in Arkansas while the case is pending. The boy has some stability there, and he attends school and works with a therapist. Arkansas wants jurisdiction in the matter.After leaving Florida, McCready and her son were tracked down to a home in Arkansas, where they were found in a closet by officials. The boy was put into foster care. The mother has remained in the area and has visited with him.
But that has drawn the ire of the boy's father, who had visitation rights and spent time with him in Florida while the child lived with his grandmother. He wants his son to return to Florida.
The Florida judge had ordered the boy returned to Florida, but Arkansas officials legally do not need to follow such rulings from other states, officials from the Arkansas Department of Human Services have said.
The judge said settling the case and giving the boy a stable living environment and childhood is of the greatest importance, which is how child custody cases should be resolved. That could start by all parties agreeing to discuss the issue rationally.
Source: News-Press, "Lee County judge calls Mindy McCready case 'nuts,' wants states to agree on plans," Ashley A. Smith, Feb. 21, 2012
]]>The boy at the center of the dispute, now 16, no longer can be subject to the rules of the Hague Convention that concern child abduction across international lines. He can now continue to live with his mother in the United States and wants no contact with his father.
]]> The father, a British citizen, and the mother, an American, got married in England, had their son in Hawaii and then moved to Chile. When the couple separated in 2003, a Chilean court gave the mother custody and visitation rights to the father. The court said neither parent could take the boy out of Chile without the other parent's consent.But the mother took the boy, then 10, to the United States, contending she couldn't find a job or a place to live because of visa restrictions.
Winding its way from court to court, the case eventually wound up in a federal appeals court in New Orleans, where the court ruled that the father didn't have custody rights under the Hague Convention, but did have the right to visit his son in the United States.
The U.S. Supreme Court later overturned the ruling and sent it back to federal court. During this time, the boy turned 16, meaning the Hague Convention protections expired.
The mother, who now lives in Texas with her son, said they both were relieved the custody case finally had ended. The dispute underscores the fact that parents disputing custody should keep lines of communication open, or consult with family law attorneys to try and reach an agreement.
Source: CNN, "Child at center of high court fight over custody gets closure," Bill Mears, Feb. 14, 2012
]]>But it's important to avoid painting with a broad brush, which would cause many good parents to fall victim to new laws that should never apply to them.
]]> The boys, ages 5 and 7, died after their father blew up their home in another state, killing himself and his sons. The man had been the person of interest in the disappearance two years ago of his wife, and he and his wife's parents were battling in court over who should raise the children. The children's father lost permanent custody when his father, with whom he and his children lived, was arrested on child pornography charges.A state family court had granted custody to the boys' maternal grandparents just days earlier, but the father maintained supervised visitation rights. When the boys and the supervisor arrived, the boys' father slammed the door in the face of the social worker.
Experts said that most states do not have laws governing custody or how visits with a noncustodial parent are handled. Instead, judges typically can use their judgment. One child advocacy group said it may be time to write a set of rules for judges to follow.
Legal observers said the judge never could have foreseen the boys' deaths, and that this judge handled the case by applying the standards of "best interest for the child." In this case, it was to allow the children to maintain a relationship with their father. And unless there is evidence of violence or substance abuse in a parent's home and a court specifies a site, the visitations can still happen there, legal experts said.
Source: USA Today, "Powell tragedy sparks questions about child custody," Yamiche Alcindor, Feb. 7, 2012
]]>The U.S. Government Accountability Office reported that the struggling economy translated into the first dip in collections in 2009 since 1975. Nationwide figures for 2010 and 2011 were not part of the report.
]]> Louisiana has seen an increase in funds collected in the approximately 280,000 collections it monitors. In 2010, the state took in $365.3 million for families, up from $354 million in 2009 and $346.1 in 2008.An official with the Child Support Enforcement for the Department of Children and Family Services attributed Louisiana's strong performance in child support collection to the state's strict enforcement as well as a more stable economy in the state than some other spots in the United States.
Another official with the department said Louisiana will continue to be aggressive in collecting support that is owed to families. Over the next several months, the state will expand its use of advanced software that searches computer records to find if a parent who is required to pay support receives any government funds. Some payments, such as benefits for workers' compensation, can be tapped into for child support.
Last year, Gov. Bobby Jindal signed off on legislation that allows Louisiana officials to monitor winnings in state casinos and will anyone winning in excess of $1,200 against the names of people who are behind in their support payments. If the winner's name shows up on such a list, the casinos must give the winnings to the state to satisfy delinquencies.
Source: Times-Picayune, "Louisiana bucks national trend on child support collections," Bruce Alpert, Feb. 2, 2011
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